Have you ever had this happen…a friend calls you up to invite you over for a get together. You would love to go but the challenge of a long drive, late hours, and lack of accessibility makes the decision for you. You politely decline but inside feel miserable because you realize how limiting your life has become.
There are times when having a disability is a great thing because you have an excuse to decline an invitation to a party you have no interest in going to or a reason to not help a friend move the furniture in their house. But it’s sad when you can’t join in on something you really want to be a part of.
Life changes with MS…which sucks. You find yourself making decisions based on how difficult it is to climb the stairs rather than on whether you have to pick up a gift and a platter of food on the way. The depression that weights on you can be hard to deal with and even overwhelming at times. It’s not an easy thing to come to terms with.
At this time of year it can become extra hard because you see people going out enjoying the holidays, spending time together shopping…doing all the able-bodied things people do that you are no longer capable of doing. It seems the winter months have this way of ushering in a sadness along with the cold and the snow. I’ve felt it myself at times. It can become overwhelming if you allow your thoughts to rule the day and slip into the “why me” places.
I know it’s hard, but try and find something good in the chaos. When you have to stay home, choose to have your own party in your PJs. Even if it’s a party all by yourself, have it anyway. Don’t let the fact that you can’t go somewhere get you down.
I have a party box filled with puzzles, colored pencils, coloring books, games, legos…all those creative things I played with as a kid. I pull it out and have fun. Strangely, it’s quite therapeutic and helps me to pass the time without turning the evening into a pity party. I like my PJ parties so much better.
So the next time you have to decline a friends invite, put on some festive PJs, make some hot cocoa and pull out your party box.
I gotta go now. I have some new Play-Doh waiting to be turned into something amazing. I think I’ll mold an alien with googly eyes and spiky hair.