When I was little I loved going outside right after it rained so I could play in the mud. I would make castles with moats and cities with rivers. So many creations of mine where built in those moments. I would let my imagination run wild as the mud squished between my fingers and toes.
It didn’t make my mother all that happy though, especially when I would walk inside with muddy feet and hands leaving a trail of mud on the floor for her to clean up. And my clothes…many times they would be forever stained with traces of the mud that would never come out. I guess you could say I would make a mess of things. Messy body, messy clothes, messy floor, and when it was all over, a messy bathroom.
Messes happen all the time. You know what else is messy? Life! It’s filled with twists and turns and unexpected surprises. Add Multiple Sclerosis to the mix and you end up with not just a muddy mess but confused chaos.
MS brought a bunch of messiness into my life. Now don’t get me wrong, my life was already messy but I really didn’t need anything more muddling things up. Aren’t I lucky? MS picked me out of the thousands it could have chosen. It picked you too. And here we sit…a rumpled, goofed up, jumbled mess.
No one chooses to go through life different, in pain, struggling from moment to moment, and uncertain of tomorrow. No one wants to pack up their dreams, throw away their careers, and say goodbye to abilities they know they will need in order to get through their day. No one dreams of a life with MS.
It choses us and there’s nothing we can do about it except keep on living. That’s a choice, you know?! Living in spite of the mess surrounding you is a choice. It’s not an easy choice, but it’s a choice.
This falling apart business is not all it’s cracked up to be. Life is messy. It changes you. It’s humbling and eye-opening. Sometimes we have a hard time trying to get it all together. But I hope at least it makes you a more compassionate person towards others. I know it has for me.
Make today a good day. I don’t mean a mess free day…just a good day. You’re not alone in this messy world of MS. Let’s muddle along together through this crazy mess of a life. I think you and I, we’re doing okay…all things considered!