Have you ever had a time when you had full intentions of getting something done before the day was over, but it didn’t happen? It was at the top of your to-do list, written on several post-it notes and you even had an alert on your phone to keep you reminded, but then you sat down on the couch exhausted from the day and there was nothing left in you to do anything more. It seems once I pull my shoes off and sit down, my to-do list turns into a to-don’t one. Whatever I had written down just isn’t going to get done.
That happened to me yesterday. I had great plans of cleaning the bathroom and running a few errands. Both seem simple enough, right? And they are, until fatigue decided to pay me a visit.
Once fatigue shows up, you can forget me being able to get anything done. I can tell you this, it is one of THE MOST unwelcome guests in my life. MS being the ultimate first. Fatigue can happen early in the morning (sometimes as early as me opening my eyes with the morning sun), after my morning shower, part way through the day, or once lunch is over. Its schedule is random and it seems to have no plans of sharing the itinerary with me.
I have to admit, MS has taken some of the joy out of surprises. I think it brings more my way than my first boyfriend ever did, and that’s a lot because he would bring me flowers, gifts and notes of admiration ALL THE TIME. At least the things he brought me were lovely. I can’t say that about MS.
I have had to learn to go with the flow on a daily basis. It’s not an easy thing to do, but it is necessary in order to keep a positive outlook on life. One thing MS has done for me…it has taught me to value life way more than I ever did in the past and to not take things like being able to work for granted. Work was my passion, but now that my career is a thing of the past, living has become my new passion.
MS changed things. It made life difficult in some ways but it also gave me a different perspective on life itself. I see how precious each day is, how special caring people are and how short life can actually be.
I woke up this morning to a new day. My to-do list, post-it notes and phone reminders are ready, but I’m okay if I need to shift things around or if I fall asleep in the process and miss out on getting anything done at all. Life is too short to get caught up in the land of lists.
Enjoy living in the NOW of today. It only comes once.