I will never apologize for finding humor in the life I live with Multiple Sclerosis. Sure, some of the things I laugh about can come across as sarcastic, be a bit bittersweet and harshly real, but if I couldn’t laugh about what is happening to my body and the world around me, I don’t think I would make it through the day.
I poke fun at my brain fog moments, my unstable legs and my often limited vocabulary. I giggle thinking about how many times I’ve forgotten what I was talking about smack dab in the middle of a sentence I’m trying to get out and how often I’ve misplaced my cup of coffee in the morning or have no recollection of drinking the coffee from the now empty cup in front of me.
I laugh when I miss my mouth trying to eat spaghetti, ending up with a splotch of sauce on my chin. I smile when my hands begin shaking uncontrollably causing me to drop my phone while playing a game of solitaire. I smile even more when instead of just dropping it, I end up throwing it across the room due to an unexpected involuntary muscle spasm. If you’re going to be my friend, you have to be prepared to duck…and quick!
And if you were to watch me trying to get up from a folding lawn chair, you would laugh too. I look like a breakdancing ninja stuck on an upside-down rollercoaster. Who wouldn’t laugh at that? LOL
I laugh because all my crazy mishaps and uh-oh moments are actually quite comical when you stop and look at them for what they are. I try my best to find some bit of humor in my pain and to brush off the hurt feelings brought on by the inconsiderate and selfish people that cross my path. Besides, I’d rather laugh than cry. Crying stuffs up my nose and makes my eyes all red and puffy.
Tears still come easily and fears still try to creep in to mess with my day, but I refuse to let them rule my life.
It seems a majority of people today have lost the ability to laugh. I’m amazed at the amount of people that get offended because I’m poking fun at myself and at MS. They think how dare I laugh at something as terrible as Multiple Sclerosis and the pain it causes.
But to me, I believe there’s a lot more to be mad at in the world than a girl in Alabama living with Multiple Sclerosis trying to make somebody smile. I think some people in the world today are wearing their panties a little too tight.
It’s okay to have fun and enjoy life without guilt. It’s okay to laugh at yourself and the things happening in your life. It’s okay to smile when you’re hurting. It’s okay to have fun even in the midst of a chronic illness. It’s okay, it really is.
We all need to lighten up and enjoy life more. Smile!