Sometimes I wish I could just run away

Life isn’t fair. It’s tough and filled with plenty of bad things. I go through periods of time when I simply want to get away from it all…no distractions, no phone calls, no text messages, no people, no MS, no anything. It’s at those times when I will curl up in my comfy overstuffed chair, turn my phone off and do absolutely nothing.

I know it seems impossible to be able to do nothing because even doing nothing is doing something, but somehow I manage to do it. Wait a minute, maybe I really am doing something when I think I’m doing nothing but since my brain scatters my thoughts I forget the something I was doing which turns it into nothing. Now there’s a thought to ponder.

When I step away from the mess that is overtaking my life into a place of solitude, I come back better focused and able to get things done. Sometimes it’s takes just 5 minutes of being away to regroup my thoughts. Other times it’s more like 30 minutes, an hour or even a day. But that pause does something magical and helps me to tackle even the hardest of tasks.

I can remember the times when my workload would become intense at my job. The pressure, the stress…it would become overwhelming. When that happened, I would walk away from my desk and lock myself in a bathroom stall down the hall from my office to just pause and breathe. That was the only place I knew I could truly be alone and get away from everyone and everything. Somehow time stood still for me in the bathroom. Other times I would just go for a walk around the building or to the kitchen to get a fresh cup of coffee. Anything to get away momentarily so I could better focus.

I know that sounds weird to some people, but short breaks like that really help. We all need a place where we can get away from the craziness in life in order to simply breathe. The bathroom may not be the place you choose. For you it may be a moment of solitude in your car, or out taking a walk through the mall, or hiding in your bedroom closet under stacks and stacks of laundry…but regardless of where it is, it’s important to take that time.

It would be amazing to be able to take a vacation to some remote island anytime you needed a break, but that kind of thing just doesn’t happen so you have to create your own island of escape right where you are. Today my island is my alone time on the couch as I think about spring time, butterflies and picking fresh flowers. Something other than MS, medical bills and my to-do list.

Don’t feel guilty stepping away to take a pause. Take the time you need even if that means telling someone “no.” Take charge of your day…only make sure you always keep an island close by. A cool breeze, amazing view and some drinks with umbrellas wouldn’t hurt either.

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About the Author

Penelope Conway

Penelope Conway
Penelope started Positive Living with MS as a way to help others with MS stay positive in the midst of a terrible disease. She believes that staying positive and holding onto hope is the key to waking up each morning with the strength to get through the day. Multiple Sclerosis may never go away, but neither will her determination and her drive to help others through the journey.

18 replies
  1. Rodger Ashton-Smith
    Rodger Ashton-Smith says:

    I had a break from a very stressful work an personal time and came back with MS. So I on’t take a break because I on’t know what I will get.
    I have been taking rests though it it can help setting my problems in order so small breaks are good.

  2. Jessica
    Jessica says:

    Hi everyone. I am a 36-year-old mother of three boys. I have been having all of the symptoms described here for years. I have been in and out of doctors offices to be told it’s all in my head. It wasn’t until I suddenly lost 90% of my vision 9 days before Christmas and was hospitalized for almost a week that the doctors decided to test me for MS. I’m awaiting the results, but after reading this blog I don’t see how they could be negative. I really needed this particular post about staying positive. I have been crying off and on for days on end. The pain, the confusion, the headaches, the inability to see, the numerous sudden plan changes because my body won’t cooperate.. The list goes on. I am in desperate need of support from people who understand through experience. I have never been a “give up” kind of girl. I worked three jobs while attending college and raising my boys on my own. I am a fighter, but right now I feel like I have no fight left. Giving up is not an option as long as I have three people calling me Mom. Please, I am begging for help, help in seeing that things do get better or easier to deal with.

    • Rodger Ashton-Smith
      Rodger Ashton-Smith says:

      I’m very sorry that has been for you. I know of a person who ha colour in his right eye and black & white in the other. After being on the same trial as me with MIS416 he got colour back in both eyes. I haven’t hear of full resolution of eyesight yet so I hope something comes your way soon.

  3. Kathy Buys
    Kathy Buys says:

    Can’t tell you how often recently I’ve just wanted to go to the Hill Country, load up my car & just drive. I have things I planned to do @ this time, not happening. I miss my quiet time, fun time, & being out among new acquaintances. It’s like I need me 6yrs ago when I cared for my parents & myself. They have since passed on, I’m just trying to regroup–MS is like a ball & chain on both legs now. Some days I wake up defeated on the things in my heart

  4. Heather Adsit
    Heather Adsit says:

    I use to work call centers.
    I got out and went to a bank at the end… at least I was able to be away from a leash… but that job fired me for being sick.

    I remember those days I wanted to hide.
    The call centers where worse.
    A phone on your head all day…. people calling… cussing and being loud and mean.

    I would push myself to keep up because those jobs are keep up or be fired.
    That’s where I had my ms spells.
    I would fall over and go into seizure spells.

    I hated those jobs so bad 🙁

    Now I a stay at home mom.
    I made a room in my house just to get away.
    It has tv and my meds… tens unit… massagers… things to help comfort me when I feel overwhelmed 🙂

    In the day I can just escape for about 3 min… but that is the best 3 min ever when I am overwhelmed 🙂

    On bad days my husband will let me rest away from everyone 🙂

    We can create our own get away 🙂
    Weather it be a bathroom or a room in a home.
    A small escape can do wonders 🙂

    Thanks for sharing this 🙂
    I feel normal now 😉

  5. Meeya
    Meeya says:

    LOL- at work, bathroom cubicles often are ideal places for short breaks 😆
    Although I prefer my bed at home… with that very soft & warm duvet.
    My dreams always include a forest clearing, or a beach, and an elephant… 🐘 I sometimes wonder what a psychologist would make of this?! 😃

  6. Beatrix Huber
    Beatrix Huber says:

    What can I say? I thought us MSers have it hard, and then life happened. My eighteen year old Goddaughter passed away during Advent. She simply fell asleep and didn’t wake up in the morning anymore. And my only thought is… I LOVE LIFE, and I’m glad to be alive still, despite all the circumstances.

    • Ms.Body
      Ms.Body says:

      Awe hang in there love!!! It’s unfortunate but these things happen to the VERY best of us!!! I am so so sorry for the loss of your goddaughter. See it’s events such as that most DEFINITELY puts my little life in perspective!!! I mean I have my moments but I try NOT to complain because I TRUST that somewhere somebody has it worse! Hence I do what I can when I can and the rest I can ❌NOT ❌ worry about😑. #weALLknowstressis❌NOT ❌conducivetoourhealth…praying that God strengthens and comforts you and your goddaughter family during your difficult time☝🏾

  7. Daniela Robertson
    Daniela Robertson says:

    A recharge day is lovely. Sometimes my body reminds me I’m due one so I choose a day and tell my husband so he knows not to expect much of a response from me except my request for the occasional coffee or some form of refreshment.

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