Sorry…I forgot

My ability to forget things is a skill. It takes great talent to forget birthdays, lunch plans, appointments, shopping lists, things people said only a few minutes earlier, and words that I know I know but can’t seem to find even on the tip of my tongue. And that all happens in one day. Each day is different, yet the same. I’ve become a pro at forgetfulness.

And just so you know, it’s different than old age forgetfulness or the casual “sorry, I forgot” kind of thing. My memory issues live in a universe and dimension all their own. A place where my thoughts and words float about just out of reach. I try to reach for them, but those darn words move about too much. Sometimes they hide from me and other times they simply slip through my fingers.

I try. Really, I do. If I didn’t have Post-it notes, a calendar, pen and paper, and my handy-dandy mobile phone with alarms and reminders, people wouldn’t see me for days. I’d be lost somewhere between space and time wondering where I was and how to get back home…or even where home is.

So what causes it? Take a look at my brain and it would be obvious. The damage in there looks a bit like swiss cheese. Those holes and lesions in my brain are the reason for my forgetfulness. Black holes don’t just exist in outer space you know. Some live right here…inside my brain. Talk about things getting lost in the dark. I live there.

I’m grateful for the people who patiently wait for me to get my words out into complete sentences, who remind me of the plans I’ve made, and who help me, without judgment, when I can’t remember the directions to a store I’ve been to a million-trillion times. I appreciate today’s technology for helping me keep my day in order. I’m thankful, that because of my MS cognitive problems, I get to watch a movie or show on TV that I’ve already seen as if it’s my first time viewing it and get to be surprised all over again that the butler did it.

My brain may not be able to function properly every minute of the day, but at least I know I have one. I even have documented proof. Just check out my MRI’s if there’s ever any doubts. As for some people, I think they lost their’s entirely a long time ago.

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42 replies
  1. Roland Clarke
    Roland Clarke says:

    I recommend seeing that movie – darn, I can’t find its name now – as the butler might not have murdered anyone> Or was it someone else? Time to watch it again and find out. Darth Vader?

  2. Rhona Kingett
    Rhona Kingett says:

    My forgetfulness is legendary in my family but I do get odd sequences that stick like glue and buzz round inside my head like an irritating fly.

  3. Carol Gibb
    Carol Gibb says:

    I am exactly the same, lucky to have a understanding Husband, but my Children do say Mum you have told me this more than once. I try to ask first if I have told them so I don’t get upset!

  4. Anita Kellar
    Anita Kellar says:

    I have to say this is one of the most frustrating symptom I have. It’s so embarrassing. So forgetful. I have to write it down asap or it’s gone. Then trying to talk. I know what I want to say but can’t seem to get the words out. Not nice.

  5. Rodger Ashton-Smith
    Rodger Ashton-Smith says:

    plus le change, plus la meme chose fits in well with this mess. I had a bit of forgetness this morning (it’s 11:30am 6th December) and missed the name for chilly bins. I know what they are and could describe them with detail but couldn’t remember the name. A bit of a laugh and strangely I didn’t feel odd about this as it has happened many times and can come with ‘old age’ so I have another escape line to use.

  6. Paula
    Paula says:

    Oh my gosh, I could have written this because it’s so me too! One day I received 3 packages from Amazon. Although I had ordered them all, I could not remember what was in any of them! It was like a surprise party or Christmas in the summer!

    • Rhona Kingett
      Rhona Kingett says:

      There’s a trick I picked up a number of years ago when talking to someone who gives me their name. I use it in subsequent sentences in the conversation to help fix it in my mind. It can feel a little unnatural but it works.

  7. Geraldine Lowrey
    Geraldine Lowrey says:

    Me forget? No! I’m just incredibly late with birthday cards, to-do lists, everyday tasks, etc. Once asked my then-seven year old if he wanted cucumbers for breakfast. That got him out of bed fast! I meant oatmeal! They aren’t even close! Even I laughed at that one. Now I laugh at everything. Boom-boom ain’t it great to be crazy? Silly and foolish all day long. Boo-boom ain’t it great to be crazy! Or have MS…Now why is it I remember this inane tune from childhood but not important things? It’s okay. I’ll forgry yhr question in 30 seconds. Have a great day, all!

    • Rodger Ashton-Smith
      Rodger Ashton-Smith says:

      Well done you got me laughing that I haven’t done for a long time. Cucumbers for breakfast, I don’t think so. lol

  8. Stephen
    Stephen says:

    I had something really wonderful to offer here, but I can’t recall what it was. Maybe this is why “If I Only Had a Brain” is one of my favorite songs. At least I think so.


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