What a tough week so far. I just woke up for the day and here it is 9 AM. That is just so not like me. Normally I will not sleep well through the night and yet still be awake by 6 AM. I tossed and turned though the night listening to a thunder storm (which actually for me is quiet soothing). I’m glad the last few hours that I spent in the bed this morning were actually spent sleeping…I think.
I have felt so much weaker these past few weeks. My body won’t cooperate and my brain seems to have gone on vacation. I don’t like feeling out of control like that.
That’s one thing multiple sclerosis does…it takes away your ability to control much of your life, but at least the things I can control, I’ve got. I can still laugh, smile, find enjoyment in life, cry, worry and wonder about tomorrow.
I often think about where life is heading for me and it does concern me if I allow myself to stay in that place for a long enough time. You can’t do that. Yes, acknowledge the reality you are facing. Yes, allow yourself to go through times of worries, fears and doubts. Yes, give yourself time to grieve if you need it…
But then you HAVE TO shake off the weighty negative thinking and face the day you have TODAY. You only get one today so make it count.
It may be a tough day to handle…but you are tougher than any of the things happening around you. You didn’t ask for this life. You didn’t ask for the struggles, the pain, the storms. You didn’t ask for MS, but since it’s here choose to keep pushing through all the crap that comes with it and find something good to hold on to. There is good in today. You can’t give up on being able to find it. You can’t let MS win.
Keep searching. Keep going. Keep pushing through. I believe in you!