I seriously think my stubbornness is the only thing that keeps me going amid all the craziness that happens in my life. I’m almost sure if that wasn’t a part of my personality I would have given up a long time ago.
This past weekend I cracked a rib trying to clear a section in my back yard that has some small dead surface tree roots that need to be pulled up, but the roots were just as stubborn as me. I leaned over in my chair, grabbed a surface root and started pulling. To keep from falling out of my chair I was leaning a bit sideways over the chairs arm. If I don’t do it that way, trust me, I will fall flat on my face. I don’t have great trunk control.
As I was pulling I heard a crack. Not from the root but from my rib as it was stressed from the pressure I was putting it through against the arm. Apparently I have better strength than I thought. It hurt like crazy too. It took me a minute to be able to straighten myself up and catch my breath. Every breath hurt. Every movement hurt.
The limits multiple sclerosis has placed on my life are more than I would like to have to deal with but now they are compounded by something completely non-MS related. I’m pretty good at added things into the mix that could have been prevented.
This past summer I broke two toes in a failed wheelchair transfer, before that I burned myself by pouring an entire hot pot of coffee on my lap, and before that I sliced my hand open trying to cut my own vegetables. By now you’d think I would be a bit more aware of my limitations.
That’s why I say my stubbornness is what keeps me going. I am not a quitter. It’s hard for me to not at least give something a try though. I’m perfectly fine letting someone else help me out, I just want to give things a try myself first. It makes me feel a bit more human and useful.
I hope I never give up the willingness to try things on my own. I doubt this will be my last accident. I just need to be more cautious and plan things out a little more in the future. I’m so glad my friends and family understand.