I think I slept a total of 3 hours last night if I were to add up all the time I wasn’t lying in bed just watching the minutes tick by. Nights like last night make for some really interesting days. You will find me yawning in the shower, as I work, and even as I eat and I still won’t be able to sleep for a short afternoon nap. It’s crazy how that happens.
Multiple sclerosis can truly be exhausting, more for some people than for others. I know it definitely is for me.
My days seem to always be filled with the longing to go to bed and my nights are filled with my brain refusing to sleep no matter how exhausted I am. It just won’t stop talking, and the random things it chooses to talk about are crazy. “Why can’t you buy a bag of Oreo middles? Why don’t penguins fly? Where is that middle of the universe, really!?”
I guess you could say the little sleep I do get at night are really just a few naps added together. I know I nap at 2 o’clock in the early morning hours while I’m longing to actually sleep. There’s something special about the 2 o’clock in the morning time.
When my body is screaming at me to slow down and take a break, I listen now more than I did in times past. Those pauses in my day aren’t me being lazy or a sign of weakness, they are simply a necessary part of me taking care of myself.
I can’t stop the impact of MS on my day, but I can do better at handling the exhaustion that comes with it. If that means falling asleep at random times in the day then I do it. No guilt. No shame.
Know that you are important enough to pause your day too. Life is moving at such lightning speeds and it seems to demand so much out of us that rest just doesn’t fit into our plans. Don’t buy into that lie. Rest is needed and more valuable than you may realize.
Press the pause button today, hang out the do not disturb sign, and make the choice to be still in the middle of the day. Just try not to snore too loudly…or drool.